Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
