They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
