FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
