she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize