he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Randomize
