There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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