Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
