We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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