3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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