you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Randomize
