Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
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