Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
