I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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