College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
