Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
