i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Randomize
