I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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