sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
they're like a gay fantastic four
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
