So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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