I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Randomize
