whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
