ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
