Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
