Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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