Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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