i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
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