i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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