i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
