So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
