I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
