My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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