On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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