is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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