The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
