Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
