Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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