There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
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