I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
