I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
