I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
thus making me awesome and them whores
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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