So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize