I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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