he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
