Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize