I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
