The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
