found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
