A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
