Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
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