If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
